Avast, mateys!
The St. Paddy's Day update be conquerin' the high seas o' the App Store and Google Play! With all-new, limited armor to collect and more nefarious bosses to defeat, ye'll be sure to have yerself a mighty fine...
... What?
What do you mean "nothing to do with pirates?"
Look, I don't even know how to convey an Irish accent via text, so I chose the next-best thing, okay?
...
Arr.
Get it here on Android:
http://bit.ly/YYsW9u and iOS:
http://bit.ly/15w19SK
Comments
LEP-BRO-KAHN
This tophat will not only put hair on your chest, but on your face as well. The active ingredient in the green dye can also be used as a steroid cream. See a doctor before wearing.
The micro-filaments used to weave this outfit provide adequate protection against most forms of kinetic projectiles, but are prone to shrinkage in the drier.
PUGILIST
Even the most civilized Bro needs to let off steam now and then. Microscopic hooks are inserted directly into your skull, keeping this hat in place no matter how hard you're hit.
Fensheep wool harvested on New Dublin VI makes these garments extra absorbent, giving you the peace of mind to swing your fists without needing to shower... though you probably should.
BRONCO
Tranubian cattle poachers always attack from the right. That's why this carbon composite headgear is designed with safety in mind. Embedded sensors provide a 360 degree view of the terrain.
There's a new sheriff in town, and his name is you! Studded with a solid gold badge that reflects sunlight directly into their eyes. You'll make sure they don't come back now, ya hear?
Chaffing is the number one cause of death among Tranubian cattle herders. Protect your valuables and your life with these comfortable riding chaps. Your grandchildren will thank you.
FRUIT OF THE BOOMS
Some days you just don't have time to dress for the occasion. These M.O.M. approved support briefs come standard with toothpaste, coffee, and suntan dispensers. Because pants are for chumps.
You can also catch a look of the Lep-Bro-Kahn here on our Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10151489401979604
"A man who makes no mistakes, is a man who does nothing at all." -Favorite Quote